We’ll Soon See if Barack Goes BRRR–AAA–CCCKKKK!

March 14, 2009

 

You can call Joe Biden a lot of things: loudmouth, loose cannon, plagiarizer. Now add prescient to the list. CNN reported today that Russia’s Interfax news agency has announced its interest in using Cuban airfields during patrol missions of its strategic bombers. Just as Biden predicted during the campaign at a speech in Seattle, we may be seeing the “major international crisis” that he expected to test the fortitude of our new Commander-in-Appeasement, Barack Obama.

“There are four or five airfields in Cuba with 4,000-meter-long runways, which absolutely suit us,” Maj. Gen. Anatoly Zhikharev told Interfax.

Zhikharev, who is the chief of staff of the Russian Air Force’s long-range aviation, said, “If the two chiefs of state display such a political will, we are ready to fly there.”

Hopefully Barack will have fulfilled his promise of closing Guantanamo by the time the Russians arrive—the base will make suitable quarters for the Cossacks, whom Barack will, no doubt, eagerly welcome in his new global community.

“Mark my words, it will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy,” Biden said back in October. “The world is looking. We’re about to elect a brilliant 47-year-old senator president of the United States of America. Remember I said it standing here . . . we’re gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy.”

So here we have it. As so often happens, history is repeating itself, and we’re going to soon see if our new prez has the gumption to go nose-to-nose with Vladimir Putin, who has been busy rebuilding the Soviet empire by slapping down Chechen rebels and invading Georgia while Obama has been tilting at windmills. Presumably, Putin won’t agree to a game of H-O-R-S-E to negotiate matters, and the silk-talking Obama will have to finally use some tough rhetoric to conciliate the potentially disastrous engagement. Of course, we can always use Hillary, our new Secretary of State, as the point man. We’ll surely get a tough stance from the woman who didn’t have the balls to call out her husband when he was getting hummers in the Oval Office. God forbid, we may even find ourselves wishing for the good ol’ days when “W” was running the ranch.

But wait…it gets better. Zhikharev also told Interfax that Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez has offered a military airfield on La Orchila island as a temporary base for Russian strategic bombers.

“If a relevant political decision is made, this is possible,” he said, according to Interfax. Zhikharev said he visited La Orchila in 2008 and can confirm that with minor reconstruction, the airfield owned by a local naval base can accept fully-loaded Russian strategic bombers.

Let’s get Sean Penn and Susan Sarandon on that one, Mr. President. Penn’s jump shot is weak, and Sarandon is iffy with her back to the basket, but we know they can both go to their left. The fun is about to begin…I’ll take Putin laying the points.