Come On Hollywood, Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is

April 18, 2011


Well it’s time to put up or shut up all you sanctimonious liberal elites in Hollywood. A perfectly ripe opportunity is developing that will allow you to once again demonstrate how enlightened and sensitive you all are to the plight of the downtrodden. So come on down Susan Sarandon and bring your boy Tim with you. Step right up, Sean Penn, and drag George Clooney along. I know Matt Damon, Tom Hanks, and Janeane Garofalo will be first in line to get the ball rolling. And you all know what you need to do: Boycott the Cannes Film Festival!!


You see France continues to subjugate and discriminate in ways that must surely be offensive to your sensibilities. Why just today those wine-swilling, baguette-munching monsters stopped a trainload of Tunisian refugees at the border and refused them entry because after years of being overrun by Muslims who refuse to assimilate, they have finally figured out that “embracing other cultures” is harmful to the homeland—that their very own history and traditions stand to be subverted by foreigners who look to exploit rather than enculturate.


This outrageous atrocity at the border comes hard on the heels of the French law that forbids the wearing of burqas in public. Surely in the face of all this oppression and hate-mongering in the home of the Fleur de Lis, Johnny Depp will pull up stakes, and the Hollywood limousine liberals will shun the south of France and refuse their Palme d’Or’s. Or not.


I’m sure it’s not that hard to boycott Arizona when it commits crimes against humanity because who wants to hang out with the cactus, overbearing heat, and Mexican drug criminals anyway? But you’ll have to dig a little deeper to forsake the Riviera and its long, bloated list of five-star shops, restaurants, and beaches. You’ll really have to show some intestinal fortitude on this one, but I have faith. After all, far be it from the Hollywood royalty to think of themselves when there are freeloaders waiting at the trough.


It’s hard to feel sorry for the overwhelmed French people as they and the other European Union nations thought it would be warm and fuzzy to have a global community and now are suffering the consequences as they discover that fairy tales are just that. Alas, the stagecoach always turns back into a pumpkin, and now the French have to try and make pie; but at least they’re trying to regain their sovereignty, unlike the ignorant Hollywood types who live in the hills and Malibu while the little people are swarmed.

We’ll Soon See if Barack Goes BRRR–AAA–CCCKKKK!

March 14, 2009


You can call Joe Biden a lot of things: loudmouth, loose cannon, plagiarizer. Now add prescient to the list. CNN reported today that Russia’s Interfax news agency has announced its interest in using Cuban airfields during patrol missions of its strategic bombers. Just as Biden predicted during the campaign at a speech in Seattle, we may be seeing the “major international crisis” that he expected to test the fortitude of our new Commander-in-Appeasement, Barack Obama.

“There are four or five airfields in Cuba with 4,000-meter-long runways, which absolutely suit us,” Maj. Gen. Anatoly Zhikharev told Interfax.

Zhikharev, who is the chief of staff of the Russian Air Force’s long-range aviation, said, “If the two chiefs of state display such a political will, we are ready to fly there.”

Hopefully Barack will have fulfilled his promise of closing Guantanamo by the time the Russians arrive—the base will make suitable quarters for the Cossacks, whom Barack will, no doubt, eagerly welcome in his new global community.

“Mark my words, it will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy,” Biden said back in October. “The world is looking. We’re about to elect a brilliant 47-year-old senator president of the United States of America. Remember I said it standing here . . . we’re gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy.”

So here we have it. As so often happens, history is repeating itself, and we’re going to soon see if our new prez has the gumption to go nose-to-nose with Vladimir Putin, who has been busy rebuilding the Soviet empire by slapping down Chechen rebels and invading Georgia while Obama has been tilting at windmills. Presumably, Putin won’t agree to a game of H-O-R-S-E to negotiate matters, and the silk-talking Obama will have to finally use some tough rhetoric to conciliate the potentially disastrous engagement. Of course, we can always use Hillary, our new Secretary of State, as the point man. We’ll surely get a tough stance from the woman who didn’t have the balls to call out her husband when he was getting hummers in the Oval Office. God forbid, we may even find ourselves wishing for the good ol’ days when “W” was running the ranch.

But wait…it gets better. Zhikharev also told Interfax that Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez has offered a military airfield on La Orchila island as a temporary base for Russian strategic bombers.

“If a relevant political decision is made, this is possible,” he said, according to Interfax. Zhikharev said he visited La Orchila in 2008 and can confirm that with minor reconstruction, the airfield owned by a local naval base can accept fully-loaded Russian strategic bombers.

Let’s get Sean Penn and Susan Sarandon on that one, Mr. President. Penn’s jump shot is weak, and Sarandon is iffy with her back to the basket, but we know they can both go to their left. The fun is about to begin…I’ll take Putin laying the points.